Monday, August 14, 2017

Michael Monday #57

Just when I thought Michael was completely laying low somewhere exotic, drinking bloody mary's and eating sushi, he pops up in Wisconsin, of all places this weekend, driving in another Ferrari Challenge. There are a few pics of him with fans, but I don't really like posting those. So here's one taken from Nathan Sol on his Instagram. A lucky shot by some dude at the right place at the right Fassy time. Looks like Michael is driving fine as he made it in the top five of a race this weekend.

Friday, August 11, 2017

TGIF 8.11.17

Michael at Cannes 2015

Are you one of those people who are neat freaks obsessed with collecting your music and movies as digital downloads only in one neat digital file location? Or, are you one of those people with a cluttered house due to all the plastic containers holding your favorite entertainment media? If you're like me, you're in the latter group and are counting the days until next Tuesday to buy the Alien Covenant Blu-ray. But I may not watch it immediately. I'll wait until the following weekend so I can watch Prometheus and Covenant back to back, in their extended versions. How about that? I bet you didn't even think about doing that before I mentioned it. Copy Cat! :-)  I have no idea what Michael Fassbender is up to at this very moment, but I hope he's chilling out and relaxing a bit, on his own terms, far away from pap, as he gets ready to promote The Snowman coming out in October.

Monday, August 7, 2017

Michael Monday 56

Q: You have a bit of a reputation for being a Hollywood wild man. How did that start?

MF: "I don't know. I suppose it makes for a more interesting read than Michael Fassbender, normal guy". - Time Out Dubai 2014

Friday, August 4, 2017

TGIF 8.4.17

It's been one of those weeks when I do an innocent Google search on Michael Fassbender, and I come up with shit that is NOT Michael Fassbender! And please, rest your brains, I'm sure Michael wants a child one day, his own sexy blue eye mini me, but it will be with someone who is not on the, let's just say, media radar at the present. When people start talking about families and baby stuff to support their magazine cover interviews, out of the blue, I just roll my eyes because this is in the first chapter of the PR manual, 'How to sell an upcoming movie to the public'. I'll leave it at that.

So as you may be aware, the digital format of Alien Covenant was released on August 1st. In less than two weeks on August 15th, we'll be able to buy our tangible copy of the Blu-ray disc and all the goodies that come with it. I have on my calendar to go to Target after work (maybe even during lunch), to buy it there because the Blu-ray version to be sold at Target will be more David focused with a supplement booklet of David's macabre creations on his lonely planet Frankenstein lair. And for those of you who did not go to the theater to watch Covenant, you can read the FF review, or go to the reputable Roger Ebert website where they give a huge thumbs up review!

It looks like Michael's The Snowman will not make any fall festival appearances, and like I said before, that's perfectly fine (however, it still may be a late addition). In a way, I'm relieved because I just cannot make it to TIFF or any film festival this fall because of other commitments and logistics. And that's another reason why I'm using a photo of Michael from the TIFF 2016 Soiree where he was the guest of honor, and I was in attendance in the audience. When I look back at this time last year, I'm proud of my rare Stan level* determination last year in taking a day off from work to drive to Toronto starting at 7 am in the morning, arriving there around noon, to get there in time to park, eat, freshen up and change into Soiree attire. Then immediately after the talk was over, I ran to my car and was on the road by 9:45 pm. Arriving home around 2:30 am, and at work at 7:30 am. That's time management like a mofo! And, I repeated that the following Saturday so I could see Trespass Against Us at TIFF! If you think about it, Michael could have been the Soiree guest this year and I would not have been able to attend, and that would have sucked extremely bad.

*I don't like using the word Stan in reference to myself. I'm sure loads of people think I am a stan, but Stan is short for Stalker Fan. Such a fan regularly stalks a celebrity and is intrusive in their personal life, know too much personal information about said celebrity and their schedule, hang out at their hotel, lurk around the celebrity's private home, have delusions of grandeur about their relationship with the celebrity, and often poses a security threat to the celebrity. I'm none of that. In this instance, I jokingly use 'stan level' based on my determination and perfect execution of time to see my favorite actor in the world at a public event honoring him during a very limited time frame I had available. :-)

Lastly, I've been reading about how so many A/B list celebrities have been doing so well in their transition from movies to TV shows. Quite a few have been nominated for Emmys - Nicole Kidman is just one A-lister to note. So this brings me to create a poll asking fans if they would like to see Michael take on a TV movie role or a limited series on regular TV or cable TV. As we all know, Michael's career as an actor started from being on TV shows in the UK, and now a decade later, with top stars returning to TV or doing TV shows for the first time, it has become not only profitable for them, but it is exposing them to an audience that may not have seen the celebrity in their movies. I can't tell you how many times I've read a tweet from someone saying that they just saw X on X tv show, and now they need to check out their films. TV shows are a perfect form of advertising one's talent to an audience that is otherwise ignorant of said celebrity's film career. So, maybe this is something that Michael could consider. I'm still waiting for him to do a play on the West End.

Monday, July 31, 2017

Michael Monday #55

I am beautiful, no matter what they say.

A list came out last week from a doctor using the so called Greek Golden Ratio of Beauty Phi, it is a theory on the mapping of a human face to find perfection. Well, this top ten list completely failed to have Michael 'The Most Perfect Male Profile on Planet Earth' Fassbender as one of the beautiful ten men in the world, but instead, listed a whose who of pop culture A-listers that anyone from a 3rd grader to someone in convalescent care hooked up to oxygen would know who they are, courtesy to a steady diet of People and Us magazines. Matt Boomer didn't even make the list, so you know some massive lazy fuckery is abound. I'm not going to bother repeating the men's names here, but I will say that 7 of them don't belong on the list.  Michael Monday proudly honors the man beauty of Michael Fassbender! Here here!

Friday, July 28, 2017

TGIF 7.28.17

Both the Toronto Int'l Film Festival and Venice Film Festival made announcements of the films that will screen at their respective festivals. Venice released their entire roster, and The Snowman was not listed, and so far, it's not on the schedule for TIFF. There's still a chance for it to screen in Toronto, as that festival slowly rolls out its film schedule over a course of several weeks through mid-August.  So there's still time. But, in the event Michael's Snowman doesn't make it on the fall festival round, that's ok, not every film released in the fall/winter is shown at the film festivals. Alicia's movie with James McAvoy will screen at TIFF, so, to capitalize on the good PR their relationship creates, it makes you wonder if Michael will indeed have his film screen there. However, we won't know for sure until another week or two when the rest of the TIFF lineup is announced. Like I wrote last year, while I was still home in Michigan, I took advantage of attending TIFF for the Fassy Soiree, but this year, I'm taking a break from TIFF due to logistics. Even if I really wanted to go to Toronto in the event Michael was attending, I can't because I'm going to see my other husband celebrity crush, Eddie Vedder at the Ohana Music Festival on September 9th.

Anyway, I haven't seen Shame in a long time, and this is the film that really put Michael on the map. He won Best Actor at the Venice Film Festival in 2011 - starting off the Oscar season talk that year that he would be nominated, and you know how that ended. Shame is a hard movie to watch regularly, unlike say, his Jane Eyre. Hunger is hard to watch too, and I refuse to watch Eden Lake ever again.

Monday, July 24, 2017

Michael Monday 54

I saw an advert on TV this weekend for the upcoming release of Alien Covenant on Blu-ray. Even if Michael Fassbender wasn't a part of these last two Alien films, I'd still enjoy them because I have loved the Alien series since the early 80s. I'm sure the video (8/15) and digital (8/1) sales for Covenant will do well, it's just too bad that people are too preoccupied to go to the movies to see non-superhero films. Part of the reason why I like these last two Alien films is because they were more intelligent in trying to explain the origins of the xenomorphs and how humans inadvertently created an agent that helped pollinate the creatures. Well, whatever kept crowds from going to the theater to see Covenant, I hope when they watch the blu-ray, they'll see what a truly great sci-fi/horror film they missed this summer.

Friday, July 21, 2017

TGIF 7.21.17

So what do you think of the new trailer for The Snowman? It looks really intense and violent. Taking something so innocent like a snowman, and making it creepy and evil is warped on so many levels. Michael will star in this film as detective Harry Hole, his first time in a role as an authority figure, albeit with some personal and emotional baggage. I'm going to make a point to read the book before I see the film, but I want a book that writes, 'Now a major motion picture starring Michael Fassbender', you know, for posterity and stuff. Right now, at, the books currently on sale have, 'Soon to be a major motion picture'. That ain't good enough, I want Michael's name on the book dammit. Hopefully new prints of the book will be printed soon with Michael's name headlining on the book cover. I'm sure this film will do well at the box office, especially in Europe, to justify a continuation of this crime series with Michael.

Meanwhile, if you're like me and haven't read any of Jo Nesbø's books on Harry Hole, read this article at The Slate, 'What Makes Jo Nesbø's Books So Addictive?'

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

The Snowman Trailer

Michael Fassbender's next film, The Snowman, based on the novel by Thomas Alfredson will be out on Otober 20th!

Monday, July 17, 2017

Michael Monday #53

I've come to enjoy the Michael Monday posts because the focus is really on the nice photo of Michael Fassbender I choose to use. I'm in the film festival spirit and I think that Michael's The Snowman (to be released in October) is going to be announced very soon to play at Venice. It's the perfect film festival venue for this film. Michael has had many films premiered at Venice, and back in 2011, he won Best Actor for Shame.

Friday, July 14, 2017

TGIF 7.14.17

Photo of Michael by Jeremy Liebman
After opening his private life up for public consumption in the past few weeks, Michael Fassbender is back into his protective shell, far away from the paparazzi, contemplating his next projects. I'm glad this week has been calm, I needed a break.

Monday, July 10, 2017

Michael Monday #52

Prepping for Steve Jobs (2014). Michael wanted to break his arm to get out of this role. He was joking, but, was he?

Sunday, July 9, 2017

My Theories on the Perfect Timing of Ibiza

When the pictures started to roll out last week of Michael Fassbender and Alicia Vikander enjoying their holiday in Ibiza, like everyone else, I was overwhelmed with several emotions about the pictures. Firstly, as a huge Michael Fassbender fan, I was happy to see HIM in swim trunks (they were too long IMO), then I was happy seeing him enjoying himself. Then I was a little perplexed about the suddenness of the images, and how out of the blue the extra serving of PDA was between Michael and Alicia. For the past 3 years, they both were notorious in protecting and keeping private their relationship. They wouldn't even kiss on the kiss camera at the BAFTAs. I didn't blame them, they're not circus monkeys at anyone's bidding to play kissy on demand. But something has changed recently to make them appear more, pap friendly in permitting themselves to be on full display during their current vacation.

I have several theories, which I referenced previously in recent days. But, someone called me out on being deliberately obtuse, and I agree, I shouldn't have announced that I had theories if I wasn't willing to elaborate. So, I have theories on angles from both perspectives of Michael and Alicia, but since I'm fully on board the Fassbender train, therefore, I'll only reveal two of my theories on the release of these Ibiza pics specifically regarding Michael. These theories are just speculation, but I think they are fair educated guess speculations as someone who is a fan and has a vested interest in the ongoing success of Michael's career.

First and foremost, we have to be frank, Alien Covenant did not perform as well as expected. Unfortunately, it failed to earn anywhere near the $403 million worldwide that Prometheus earned. Covenant, as of today, has earned $231 million. That is not bad for an R-rated sci-fi horror film. We have to keep in mind several factors. Covenant's production costs were $32 million less than Prometheus, and Prometheus was released in 2012, exactly 15 years since the last Alien film. With only five years difference between these two films, and the mixed reviews of Prometheus (another great film), people just weren't in a rush to go see Covenant in the theater. In fact, R rated sci-fi horror films tend to do better with their DVD/Blu-ray sales to help recover production and marketing costs. So that brings me to Theory #1: Alien: Covenant will be digitally released on August 1st, and released on Blu-ray, DVD, and 4K Ultra HD on August 15th. Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment want to make as much bank as possible with the digital and video sales - it's important to recoup as much as they can.

The movie going experience is rapidly changing for a lot people, myself included, as we don't have the expendable income to keep going to see a movie each weekend and spend upwards and over $20 each time. Hell, I saw Covenant at the Arclight, and it cost me $16 and I snuck in a box of Milk Duds that I bought for $1 at Target. Mind, I saw the film's premiere for free at the TCL Chinese Theater two nights earlier. And as another example, when I saw Michael's Song to Song in March at Arclight, I also splurged and 'treated' myself to a small soft drink and caramel popcorn, bringing that total theater viewing to $27. And I was by myself!  Imagine people going out on a date, or a family going to see a movie? This is the crux of why people are waiting for films to be released on home video, or streaming it later. Why not wait to buy the DVD for $22, and have the film as part of your film library forever, allowing you to watch it as many times as you want? This is not rocket science. Go to theater, spend $20, sit in an uncomfortable seat, deal with assholes talking, eating popcorn next to you too loudly, another asshole checking their text messages, someone with a gigantic head blocking your view... or, buy the DVD and watch it in the comfort of your own home on your slick 72 inch TV screen and Dolby surround sound system. And invite friends to watch it with you!

But there's a part two to Theory 1: The China Effect. Alien Covenant should have made much more money in Asia than it did. I think it earned about $31 million. But it was projected to earn closer to $75 million. The Chinese government love to censor Western films that don't meet their "morals" standards. So they not only removed all the scary alien scenes where the Xenomorphs burst out of people (that's the money shot, hello!), but they also deleted the Walter and David lip peck. The actual Chinese citizens who are social media savvy were aware that their government would slice the shit out of the movie, and they stayed away. They're not stupid, they're going to wait for the blu-ray version too, albeit the bootleg versions that will be available in that country.  So with the Chinese neutering Covenant, and demonizing it for the .3 second lip peck between two androids and (Michael Fassbender and his male double), it greatly affected the film's box office performance in that region of the world.

So what does this have to do with Ibiza? Well, even here in the States, deplorablespeople tripped out via social media that they didn't want to see Covenant because of its gay agenda, so again, this mere kiss which was incorrectly touted (for click bait headliners) as a gay kiss, scared off some film goers. Because of this, we now have the handsome Michael Fassbender, kissing and playing on a yacht with his beautiful movie star girlfriend of three whole years. See, he's not gay, he's an actor, and Michael is with his actress girlfriend enjoying a holiday together. The August dates for the digital and DVD releases are less than a month away. This is the perfect time to show the world that Michael Fassbender is a sexy guy enjoying time kissing his sexy girlfriend. Hint hint, He really doesn't kiss male stunt doubles and androids for real. And this is why we have grand paparazzi access to an otherwise private yacht party affair. The paparazzi didn't intrude, they were tipped off, albeit to remain at a distance. This is NORMAL in the industry.

Theory 2: Those James Bond rumors - where there's smoke there's fire. Although Daniel Craig has finally agreed to do his fifth and final James Bond film soon, there are several actors whose names keep being referenced for the past 3-4 years. Michael Fassbender is one of the top actors to possibly replace Craig, and he has ALL the qualities: good looks, European looks, Irish accent, physicality. And specifically, for those who think Michael is too old to play a new James Bond, Brosnan, Dalton, and Moore were all older than Michael is now (read). Like how Tom Hiddelston infamously made a fool of himself last summer in his bid to be considered to replace Craig because Tom's name used to be mentioned, he too went to the beach to show off his body with his lady friend and the media coverage was a huge failure. But unlike Tom, Michael's fun in the sun was more natural and he seemed to be really enjoying himself. He also displayed himself as athletic, very fit, diving, swimming, and being with his girl. Theory 2 isn't as strong as my Covenant support theory, but now is a great time for Michael and his people to position Michael as a strong contender to replace the great Daniel Craig with these fun pictures from Ibiza.

Lastly, as much as I use sarcasm and a cynical tone in some of my posts, that is not to imply that my respect and admiration for Michael Fassbender should ever be called into question. I will always, always support Michael's career choices and support what he does on his down time. I do want to take a moment to warn fans that there is a segment of people in social media that are on the periphery of the fandom who want to fan the flames of bullshit rumors and some blind items that are not about Michael, but these sick people want people to think some disturbing gossip is about Michael. He's a really decent person and does not deserve the unfair hate being flung his way by some really demented, mentally unstable people.

Friday, July 7, 2017

TGIF 7.7.17

If there's ONE good thing that came out of those hot Ibiza yacht pictures of Michael and Alicia, it is this one photo of Michael. Often when the pap who take pictures of celebrities frolicking on the beach, water, or yachts, they focus way too damn much on the woman - because 99.3% of the paparazzi are scuzzy dudes. Sure, they give us a few pics of the guys they are with, but they don't FOCUS on the men, especially a man like our Fassy. So, thank you to whoever orderedsuggested that they go to Ibiza to play under the sun and swim in the pretty, cool blue wa wa, because we now have THIS picture for some of us to print out and place on our altarcshrineofficephotoofpretendhusband Fassy favorite pics memory book. Michael was very happy at this moment, and I'm damn happy looking at him being happy and shit.

Some people are confused about why Michael is "so pale". Well, you insensitive morons, Michael is of the ginger persuasion, and a sweet blending of Irish and German blood, the combination of two peoples that tend to be very fair. Redheads don't tan easily, if at all, and Michael lovingly falls into this group. I love his beautiful skin, it looks healthy and vibrant. I'm sure he's wearing some sunblock of at least 50 SPF. And yes, I would pay my own way to his next beachy vacation to rub some sunblock on him... every recommended two hours, all.over.his.body, just to be safe and to give him the glorious protection his skin needs.

This TGIFassy post brought to you by: Mike's Harder Cranberry Lemonade. I had a stressful day at work and this shit works fast on someone who doesn't drink often. Cheers!

ps. Michael, please wear these type of swim trunks next time, please? They're on sale at Nordstrom Rack. Have your people call me and I'll get them for you as an early Xmas gift! Don't be shy, show off what yo mama gave you!

Thursday, July 6, 2017

Michael and Alicia's Summer in Ibiza!

Michael Fassbender and his girlfriend, Alicia Vikander, co-star of The Light Between Oceans, have been spending quality time with each other so far this summer, and it appears to be an attempt to make up for lost time, as well as to assure the nosey prying eyes of the public, that they are still in a relationship. And what better way to do that than to up the ante and go on a yacht with friends, wearing flattering swim suits to show off their fabulous bodies, and show some public displays of affection. Why now? Why not? Both Michael and Alicia are young and attractive celebrities, and every time there is an interview with one or the other, the interviewer always ask a question about their partner, as if they are obligated to provide an update. Both Michael and Alicia have been defensive, coy, or deflected the question for privacy, as is their right. However, sadly, the downside of being a celebrity is that that very gossip machine demands that these two beautiful people prove that they are in a relationship, and in fact, can display human affection towards each other.

A sad band of online haters have been non-stop in demeaning Michael and Alicia since they started to date when they were filming the beautiful The Light Between Oceans in late 2014. There have also been a lot of nasty rumors and unfounded gossip designed to put a spotlight on the legitimacy of this relationship. But through all that, here they are, on the ocean, off the coast of Spain enjoying life with each other and their friends. Yes, I'm surprised that their relationship has lasted this long, I expected it to end by April of this year because their busy careers were taking them in different directions. I have my own theories, but it's not for public sharing. All I'll say is that Fassinating Fassbender will always be in support of Michael Fassbender and whatever projects, hobbies, and obligations that make him happy. C'est la vie! Photos courtesy of The Daily Mail.